Oz Blog!
by TBLewis
Summary: Yeah, I stole the title from broadway . com. Don't judge. It's that time again folks. That's right. Another Q&A! I know it's overused but it's just so darn fun. Hope to see you inside. *ON HIATUS*
1. Chapter 1

AN: Hello, fanfiction! Most of you probably don't know me because I've never written for this fandom before. Wicked is my new obsession and I recently came across these questions and answers and I just loved them. 3Mindy3's was the first one I read and I loved it. Good job! I decided that I wanted to conform and do one too. It just looked so fun. All spelling/grammar errors are mine. Anyway, enjoy!

**Disclaimer: *sigh* Nope. Not mine.**

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Introduction.

"Aaaaahhhh!" a very confused, very pink Glinda yelled as she fell into a white room. Luckily, she landed safely on a fluffy, pink beanbag.

"Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore," a little girl with two braids said, looking around the blank room.

"Oh no," Glinda groaned, getting off the beanbag which promptly disappeared. "Not _her_."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Dorothy asked, confused.

"And they call me blonde," Glinda muttered.

"That's because you are blonde," an extremely amused green woman said. Glinda gasped and whirled around.

"Elphie!" she squealed. "You're alive! Wait, why are you alive? And who's the scarecrow?"

"Scarecrow!" Dorothy exclaimed. Toto barked in recognition. The scarecrow rolled his eyes and turned back to Glinda. Dorothy pouted in the corner.

"Hi, Glinda," Fiyero said sheepishly, looking down. Suddenly, he was tackled by a mass of pink and sparkles.

"I missed you guys so much!" she told them. "Why didn't you tell me you were alive?"

"It's a really long story," Elphaba said. "Do you know where we are and why the farm brat's here?"

"Hey!" Dorothy shouted from her corner. No one paid any attention to her.

"No idea," Glinda said. Suddenly, a twister blew into the room and Madame Morrible and the Wizard skidded across the floor.

"Elphaba!" the Wizard exclaimed. "You're alive."

"Yeah, no thanks to you," she snapped.

"I didn't know you were my daughter!"

"And that makes it okay?" They were interrupted by Nessa being wheeled into the room by some invisible force.

"Hey, what's going on?" she cried as the chair came to a stop. Her ruby slippers magically appeared on her feet and her chair disappeared as she stood up.

"We have no idea," Morrible said bitterly.

"Everyone, look for a door, or window, or something," Elphaba ordered. They searched for a while but didn't see anything. A noise distracted them from their search. *CLANK* *CLANK* *CLANK* Boq joined the rest of them through a door that suddenly appeared.

"No, no. Don't close the door!" all of them shouted—well all of them but Dorothy, who was too busy yelling "Tinny!"—but it was too late. A maniacal cackle sounded throughout the room.

"Was that you?" Fiyero asked Elphaba.

She threw up her hands. "How come whenever someone cackles, people think it's me?"

"Fae," Fiyero said gently, "it's you. And I love you, despite your cackle."

"Awww!" the disembodied voice said. "I just love you guys so much. Isn't it nice to be together again?"

"Who are you?" Elphaba demanded.

"The name's Lewis, TB Lewis," the voice replied, "but you can call me Taryn. I'm the one who brought you here."

"Why?" Nessa asked.

"That's an excellent question, Nessarose," Taryn said. "Have a seat, and I'll tell you." Eight chairs popped up out of the ground. It was pretty obvious which chair belonged to which person. Glinda received a fluffy, sparkly, pink chair. Elphie sat down in her simple but comfortable black chair. Fiyero got a beige chair that matched his Dancing Through Life pants. Dorothy got a bale of straw and Toto got a velvet cushion that said "Doggy" on it. Nessa got her "horrible chair with wheels" back and Boq got a wider, sliver chair. The Wizard got a wicker rocking chair and Madame Morrible got a metal stool. A teenage girl with her brown hair pulled up into a ponytail strolled confidently into the room.

"Welcome!" she said. "This is what I like to call the Oz Blog. Shh, don't tell anyone but I stole that name from ."

"Is this _another_ question and answer?" Glinda whined. "How many times can we answer the same questions?"

"Until I or the reviewers get bored," Taryn replied happily. "Now let's get down to business. Do you have questions or requests for me before we begin."

"No Gelphie!" Elphaba and Glinda shouted together.

"Or Foq," Fiyero added.

"I can do that," Taryn said. "Oh Fiyero, I almost forgot!" She clapped her hands and Fiyero was turned back into, well, Fiyero. "I was going to use my easy button but 3Mindy3 used it first," Taryn continued with a sigh.

"Fiyero!" Elphaba shouted and launched herself at him. They met in a passionate kiss.

"Okay guys," Taryn said. "Minimum on the PDA, please. There are minors around." They separated, flushed. Taryn rolled her eyes.

"Hey, what about me?" Boq said.

"I would," Taryn drawled, "but I don't like you. Maybe later." He pouted as much as a Tin Man could.

"Why do I get a stool?" Morrible inquired.

"Because I don't like you either," Taryn said. "Anything else?" Morrible stuck her nose up in the air and Taryn tried not to laugh at her fish-like appearance.

"Will dares be allowed?" Glinda asked.

Taryn grinned evilly. "Oh yes. I might even allow visitors and you know how crazy fan girls—and boys—can get." All of the characters paled and Taryn chuckled _wickedly_ **(AN: Haha. Punny.)**

"You wouldn't actually let them near us, would you?" Fiyero asked nervously.

"Well, I do need you intact but a fan's obsession is more powerful than even my author magic," Taryn mused. "If all of them grouped together, I pretty positive I wouldn't be able to stop them." *wink* *wink*. Nessa raised her hand, like a proper little schoolgirl. Taryn nodded to her to speak.

"Are we going to get more hate mail?" she questioned.

"Probably," Taryn shrugged. "I just relay what the people want to say. Speaking of the people, only three questions per review, please. And only one review per chapter. You can put as many comments in it as you want though. Also, constructive criticism is always welcome. I love that stuff. Well, I'll see you next time on the OZ Blog! Say goodbye, guys." The characters grumbled and a smiling Taryn disappeared into a cloud of green fog.

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AN: Yay! Please review. I can't update unless you do and I need at least three reviewers with questions. Thanks!


	2. Chapter 2

AN: Hello all. I'm back! I know it wasn't that long ago but I enjoy writing this. I hope you enjoy reading it and have some questions. Have fun!

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got

"Wakey, wakey eggs and bakey!" Taryn said in a sing song voice, as she entered the white room. Today, her hair was in a messy bun and she was still in her pajama pants and Eeyor slippers. Our characters were surprised by her sudden entrance and Dorothy screamed and fell off her bed with a _thump _while Toto just watched. Elphaba, Glinda, and Taryn all tried to suppress a smirk.

"Is there really eggs and bacon?" Fiyero asked hopefully. Elphaba rolled her eyes, as if this was a common occurrence.

"How many times do I have to tell you?" she asked. "When you're written into something like this, you don't need food."

"But I love food," he pouted. Taryn laughed and a plate of eggs and bacon fell neatly into Fiyero's white chair. He let out a slightly Glinda-like squeal and ran over to his chair. Elphaba gave Taryn a look that said, "thanks _so_ much for encouraging him." Only Elphaba could make looks sarcastic.

Taryn shrugged. "I'm the Wicked Witch of the White Room. I can do whatever I want."

"That's my line!" Elphaba huffed.

"Get her some coffee," Glinda suggested. "She's even grumpier when she doesn't have her coffee."

"I am not!" Taryn rolled her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Okay, anyone who wants food," Taryn started.

"Or doesn't want food but _really_ needs some," Glinda added.

"Or needs food," Taryn continued. "See that table over there that magically just appeared? Go tell the plates what you want and then you have a plate of food. And go!" They all rushed to the table—well, Elphie was being dragged by Glinda and Fiyero—and grabbed their plates.

"While they're pigging out," Taryn told the audience, pulling out a rainbow of neon-colored index cards, "we'll get started."

"Who is she talking to?" Nessa whispered. She was silenced by Taryn's death glare.

"As I was saying," Taryn tried again, "let's get started with the reviews. Our first review is from Elphaba-WWW. Thanks for reviewing! First off, who doesn't hate Morrible? She's awful."

"I am not awful." Horrible Morrible interrupted.

Taryn ignored her. "And I plan on overlooking Dorothy as much as possible. I find her annoying, stupid, and ignorant. I mean, any normal twelve year old would _avoid_ trying to kill someone who've they've never actually met or talked to but not our Dorothy." Elphaba snickered behind her hand.

"That's—su—ch—a terrible—thing—to—oo—o sa—aaayy!" Dorothy sobbed.

"Shut up!" everyone shouted. Her sobs turned into whimpers which were still pretty annoying. Taryn rubbed her temples and closed her eyes. She clapped her hands and Dorothy was surrounded by soundproof glass.

"So much better," Taryn sighed in relief. "Anyway, on to the questions. **'Elphaba: What do you think of a musical being based on your life and the giant fandom that comes with it?'**"

"It's not so bad, I suppose," Elphaba mused. "I really do like to sing and the musical was so much happier than the book. The fandoms are pretty great too, although Gelphie? Really guys? Glinda and I are just really close friends. I also don't like the ones where I get pregnant after a one-night stand with Fiyero. I mean, he's the biggest player at Shiz. Don't you think he'd have some sort of contraceptive? Other than that, I'm okay with it. Fiyero and I don't get out much, so we don't really have to worry about crazed fans."

"I wasn't the biggest player at Shiz, was I?" Fiyero asked.

Everyone said, "Yes, you were."

"How do you even know, Diggs?" Taryn asked. "You were never there?"

The Wizard shrugged. "I watched it on youtube." They all just stared at him.

"Moving on," Taryn said. "There's also a dare for Elphaba. **'Dare! Because I can. Do the Elphie dance- again.'** I'm assuming you mean the one at the Ozdust. Well, get to it Elphie."

"Don't call me that," she snapped. Taryn smirked, showing everyone she knew exactly what she was doing when she said it. Elphaba stood up and started to twirl her hands around each other as she moved. Her arms swayed back and forth. She didn't fall when she twirled this time and Fiyero stepped up to her.

"Glinda got to cut in last time," he smiled. "Can I have a turn?" Elphaba blushed and nodded. All the Fiyeraba fans swooned as they danced together. Horrible Morrible looked bored, so Taryn decided to drop a piano on her. Just for fun. Everyone was shocked by the loud noise and the happy couple stopped dancing.

"What was that for!?"Morrible yelled after climbing out of the piano wreckage.

"You looked bored," Taryn answered, "and I felt like dropping a piano on you. Thanks Elphaba and Fiyero. You can sit down now. Thank you, Elphaba-WWW for your review. Next on the Oz Blog!, is Zelda rules. Dude, I love your name. Zelda does rule. And thank you. I think it's cute, too. Anyway, for your questions. **'Okay Nessa, why are you so annoying?'**"

"I'm not annoying," she sniffed. "I'm misunderstood. No one knows how hard it is to be stuck in this chair with wheels. I have to be dependent on everyone. Boq tried to leave me for Glinda, so I had to stop him. So I stalked him a little bit. What's the big deal? He stalked Galinda all the time. And Elphaba ruined the family by becoming the Wicked Witch of the West and mwhsa mwha…" Somehow duct tape had covered poor Nessarose's mouth. Taryn whistled innocently.

"Thank you," Elphaba mouthed.

"Here's another question for Elphaba," Taryn announced. "**'Elphaba, why are you so awesome?'**" Elphaba blushed and Fiyero chuckled.

"I don't know," Elphaba mumbled self-consciously. "I don't think I'm awesome."

Fiyero shook his head. "You'd think after nine years of Wicked being on Broadway and thousands of fanfics about her, she'd be used to the attention by now. Or at least, have a slight rise in self-esteem but nope. Still the exact same insecure Elphaba."

"Zelda also asks Fiyero a question," Taryn told him. "**'Fiyero, why don't you like school?**"

"Would you believe me if I told you I was an Ozian Einstein?" he asked hopefully. Elphaba snorted and Taryn shook her head. "Well, I'm not entirely stupid but I don't like reading and in all of my classes you have to read so many books. I'm also not a big morning person either, so getting up just to go sit a room with a stuffy old tutor didn't really appeal to me. Then, I went to Shiz and Elphaba tutored me a little. I was always on time for those study sessions."

"AWWW!" a group of people said. The characters looked around for the audience that wasn't there.

"Guys, it was just my remote," Taryn told them and waved it at them. "See, it controls the room, sound effects, and whatever else I choose to do."

"When did you get that?" Boq asked.

"While Nessa was ranting."

"Mwa hwi dhwae!" Nessa shouted through her duct tape. Taryn sent her a small smirk. Torturing people was fun.

"Oh and Eriphabottackson," she said, "I just didn't think about it too much. I just assumed that Elphaba saw this coming. Plus it's a magical white room. Outside of this room, Nessa is still squashed."

"MHAW NWIA WHA!" Nessa screamed. Taryn pressed a button on her handy, dandy remote and Nessa inhaled blue gas. She immediately calmed.

"That is one powerful remote," Fiyero muttered.

"I want one," Glinda announced. "Only in pink."

"Can that remote turn me human again?" Boq inquired hopefully.

"Yes," Taryn replied warily.

"Will you turn me human again?"

"No."

"Why not!?"

Taryn sighed. "As annoying as Nessa is—dear, you are pretty annoying—she still didn't deserve the way you treated her. If would have just told her that Galinda asked you to ask her to the Ozdust, she most likely wouldn't have stalked you or locked you up. In short, I don't like you but we'll leave it up to the reviewers. Tell me whether you want Boq to be a munchkin again and we'll make it happen."

"Please say yes!" Boq begged. "I can't wait to be human again." Elphie and Glinda looked at each other and smirked.

_"When we're human again, only human again. We'll be knickknacks and whatnots no more,"_ they sang. Taryn clapped wildly, her every dream coming true and she couldn't be happier. The characters gave her weird looks.

"What are you all looking at?" she asked. "Do I have something in my teeth?"

"Ha ha," Elphie said. "Very funny."

Taryn smiled. "I thought so. Now onto our next reviewer. You know her and apparently don't love her, because she had to review her own story. That's right. It's me!" Morrible burst into hysterical, gulping laughter. Taryn narrowed her eyes.

"You had to review your own story?" Fiyero asked, incredulous.

"Hey, don't judge me," Taryn warned. "I get antsy when I don't write and I only had two reviews. Besides, I really wanted to ask you guys questions. All the other Q&A's were old with no hint of continuing. It's my story and I can do what I want." Morrible continued to laugh. Taryn started to laugh too and Morrible got confused.

"What?" she asked, not enjoying the fact that her moment was stolen.

"I didn't ask you any questions, so I can push you in a hole for the rest of the chapter," Taryn smiled and cackled evilly. "How do you like my cackle, Elphaba. I've been practicing."

"Not bad," she conceded. "Can we push Morrible into that hole now?"

"Be my guest," Taryn said and then giggled. "Ha! I made a joke. Like you have any choice in the matter. Nessa, since she dropped a house on you, would you like to press the button?" Nessa nodded happily and with what they assumed was a malicious smirk—they couldn't actually see because of the neon orange tape—she pressed the big button on the remote. With a Goofy-esque scream, Morrible feel into a deep hole that appeared in the white ground.

"Everyone feel better?" Taryn asked. They all nodded. "Good. Oh, and Morrible will be fine in a few hours. Onto my questions! **Wizard: I'm okay with you. My theory is that Morrible somehow enchanted you and got you to do what she wanted. Either that, or you're just pathetic and lonely. My question is why you hurt the Animals. It just isn't right, man**."

"I know," he sighed and hung his head. "At first, I wasn't okay with it. One of my best friends in Oz was a Cat. Then, he was murdered by the Gale Force because he was supposedly a resistance leader. I like power as much as the next guy but I never wanted this. Morrible is the only one who can answer the enchantment angle."

"It's a pity she looks so peaceful at the bottom of the hole," Taryn said. "I also have a dare for Elphie but we'll save that for the end. I have a comment for Fiyero, I'd like to say first." She gazed longing at the Winkie prince. "**I love you!**" she told him. "**If I didn't think Elphie would turn me into something horrid, I would marry you. That's all.**" She beamed at him and made a heart with her hands while he squirmed uncomfortable. Elphaba shot daggers in Taryn's direction.

"Think carefully before you say anything else," Elphaba growled.

"I surrender!" Taryn said with a smile. "That was much French imitation. Sorry to all my French readers. It's an inside joke at my school. Anyway, my next question is for Nessa. **Girly, I love you but you can be such a brat sometimes. Why is that? Are you just spoiled? And why are you such a jerk to Elphaba, who just so happens to be one of the sweetest people in the world?**"

"I suppose I can forgive you," Elphaba mumbled and Fiyero snickered. She promptly hit him in the arm, causing Glinda to snicker.

"Do I need to separate you three?" Taryn threatened.

"No!" they shouted.

"Then stop acting like two year olds," Taryn said. Boq mumbled something about, "you made them that way," and suddenly a rainstorm started over his head. He was rusted in a matter of seconds. Nessa's tape was taken off as gently as Taryn could manage.

"I was spoiled," Nessa said. "Father always loved me more than Elphaba and made it clear that she was only here to take care of me. I really do love her but we've never really understood each other."

Taryn nodded. "I see. Now for my dare." She was interrupted by a beeping on her iphone.

"What is that?" Fiyero whispered to Elphaba.

"I think it's called an iphone," she replied.

"Well, I just got a surprise email," Taryn announce happily. "Welcome back to Zelda rules! I know I only said three questions but in this case, I'll make an exception. **Fiyero, you and Elphie ran away together, were you going to have children? YOU SHOULD!**"

"Um…" Fiyero said.

"Yay!" Taryn shouted. "This is the perfect moment for me to show what my Big Red Button does. You see, it's possible to pass on a question but there is a penalty. It'll be different for everyone. So Fiyero, do you pass?"

"What would the punishment be?"

Taryn smirked. "You get no food for the rest of this fic. And tomorrow we're having donuts."

"I'll answer," Fiyero answered quickly. Elphaba and Glinda rolled their eyes. "Fae and I got married in Vinkus just before we left for the outer reaches of Oz. During the ceremony, Fae got vision of a little boy with raven hair and my eyes. So one day, we are going to have a child." Taryn did her fan girl squeal because Fiyeraba is her favorite pairing.

She coughed slightly and straightened her colorful index cards. "Next question. **Elphaba: I know your relationship is difficult with your father, but do you still love him?**"

"In a way," Elphaba said. "It's hard to love someone you never really knew. He avoided me and I avoided him. I love him because he's my father…" the wizard coughed and Elphaba glared at him. "But as a person, I can't stand him and I'm not just saying that because Taryn hates his guts."

"It's true," Taryn added. "I would kill Frex if I could. The first time I saw Wicked—on youtube—when he dropped them off at Shiz, it looked like he was about to hit her and she looked terrified of him. I actually hate him more the Morrible because if he just loved Elphaba like a decent human being, she probably wouldn't have wanted to meet the Wizard as badly and Nessa wouldn't be a cripple. Sorry, I got off on a tangent. It looks like we're out of time. Don't worry, we'll get to that dare whenever there's a lapse in reviews. Thanks everyone who reviewed. You guys rock!"

"Um, Taryn," Glinda said, tapping the sound proof glass. "Dorothy isn't moving."

"Darn it!" Taryn exclaimed. "I forgot to write in air holes. We'll see you next time on Oz Blog! everyone. Don't worry. Dorothy will be fine…I think."

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Review! Please. I only have so many questions to ask my characters...that aren't really mine. Anyway, review!


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Thanks so much for all the reviews. Please enjoy this latest edition of Oz Blog!

p.s. If I didn't answer some of your questions, I'm sorry but it was getting long. Ask them again and I'll try to answer.

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"I hope you're happy," Taryn grumbled. Glinda was smiling happily at she looked at her new project.

"You look so pretty!" she squealed. Taryn rolled her eyes in hopes of smudging the make-up.

"I look like a brunette Barbie doll," Taryn whined. Her hair was curled and pinned back from her face. Her eyes were smothered in smoky make-up and her lips were plastered with light pink lipstick.

"Didn't Barbie have a friend who was a brunette?" Glinda asked.

"I don't know," Taryn shrugged. "I played with trucks, not dolls, as a kid."

"That is so sad," Glinda said and shook her head.

"Why'd you even give her a curling iron in the first place?" Elphaba asked.

"Uh, guys," Nessa said. "I think people are reading this."

"Shoot!" Taryn exclaimed. "Too late to edit it out now, I suppose. Welcome back everyone. As you can tell, Glinda has brutally attacked me but I'll recover once I get all this gunk off."

"Do we have more reviews?" Boq asked hopefully.

"If we didn't, we wouldn't be here," Elphaba said and then added, "imbecile."

"Now, now," Taryn soothed, "take the insult down the Morrible hole."

"Is she still down there?"

"Yep," Taryn said happily. "Thank you to all who reviewed. You make my day. We'll start with Fiyerbaluv13. Ohh. I like this one. '**I dare Elphaba to watch my little pony.**' Here's a TV and a torture…I mean, extra room to watch it in. Go!" Thanks to Taryn's remote, Elphaba was transported to the torture chamber immediately. Within the first five minutes, it was obvious Elphaba wasn't enjoying it.

"Please make it stop!" she shouted. "I don't care whether those are ponies or Ponies, somebody just silence them forever!"

"Thank you, Fiyerbaluv13," Taryn smiled. "As much as we all love Elphaba, it's nice to see her squirm every once in a while. You can come out now, Elphaba." She all but sprinted out and ran into Fiyero's arms.

"Bad images, Yero," she mumbled into his chest. "I'll be having nightmare for a week." She stayed like that for a while. Fiyero was positively beaming.

"Thank you," he mouthed to the general public. Taryn winked at him and look at her neon orange flash card.

"Our next reviewer was BlueD," Taryn smiled. "This one really made me laugh. It's too late for that, I'm afraid. We're already awesome. Now for their questions. '**Dorothy: Why didn't you just give the dang shoes to Elphaba?!'**"

"They were so sparkly," Dorothy sighed. "And they were really comfortable. I didn't want my feet to get cold in the witch's wet basement…I mean, they wouldn't come off."

"I have a joke for you Dorothy," Taryn said. "How do your brain cells die?"

"Uh…"

"_Alone._ Moving on. **Glinda: So...I'm not the...um..."girliest" girl in the world, you know what I mean? Anywho, can you give me a few tips on being "Popular"? Please?!**"

"Well," Glinda smiled and cleared her throat. "_Whenever I see someone less fortunate that I…_"

"No!" Fiyero, Elphaba, and Nessa shouted at the same time. Elphaba quickly covered the blonde's mouth.

"Toss your hair," she said hurriedly. "That's Glinda's advice. Toss your hair."

"You guys take the fun out of everything,"Glinda grumbled.

"Okay," Taryn said, "next question by BlueD. **Elphaba: Who do you hate more: Morrible or Frex?**"

"That's a hard one," Elphaba said. "Morrible was the reason I 'died' but Frex practically locked me away when Nessa didn't want to go somewhere. Do you want Taryn's opinion or mine?"

"Go ahead and give them yours," Taryn told her. "I'll just tell them that I want to organize a group of Frex-Hunters **(AN: I give all credit for the idea Frex-Hunters to Maddy-Fae and her reviewers)** and string him up in the nearest tree."

"Yes, well," Elphaba coughed, "that's the kind of person who's locked us in a room. Anyway, I'd have to say Morrible. If she wasn't such a power hungry madwoman, things would have gone differently."

"AU ideas, anyone?" Taryn asked. "Tell me about them or just write it and inform me when you do. Thanks Elphaba. BlueD also dares Dorothy to be your servant for three more chapters because 'you have been not so nice to Elphaba.' She also adds 'Mwahaha!'"

"But I don't want to," Dorothy whined.

"Well I want to push you off a cliff," Taryn said. "We all don't get what we want. Now suck it up." Dorothy began to sniffle and Taryn groaned. "I swear to Oz if you start crying, I'll let Elphaba turn you into a newt." That quickly shut up the farm brat. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief.

"Thank you," Taryn said. "Back again on Oz Blog! is Elphaba-WWW. She has a question for Dorothy, so you can't maim her yet, Elphie." Elphaba grumbled but doused the fireball that was in her hand.

"She asks. **Do you have ANY moral issues at all? I mean really... 12 year old is transported to somewhere she doesn't know, kills the first person she meets. Joins up with three others to kill again- WHAT?!,**" Taryn read. "I agree with you. It's like she was born without a soul."

"I have a soul!" Dorothy protested and Elphaba snorted. "It's not my fault my house fell on the crippled girl."

"That's it," Nessa said, climbing out of her seat. "I'm going to kill her."

"Nessa dear, I would love to let you," Taryn said. "Unfortunately, we don't know who else wants to question her. Please refrain for now."

"Fine," Nessa mumbled and crossed her arms.

"Dorothy continue," Taryn said, glaring at the pig-tailed girl.

"The ugly green witch was hunting me!" he yelled "What was I supposed to do?"

"Um, hide in your house," Boq suggested. "Hide behind Glinda. Forget the shoes and run."

"Tinny, how could you say those things?" Dorothy sobbed.

"Can I kill her, Taryn?" Fiyero begged. "I've wanted to since she found me in the field. All she does is cry and she called Fae ugly." Taryn shook her head sadly and Fiyero sighed in disappointment.

"Our next reviewer is Zelda rules," Taryn said. "Welcome back, ZR. Is it all right if I call you that? It's so much easier to type. Her first question is for Elphaba. **Ok, Elphaba: You must love Fiyero a lot, right? I mean judging by the song 'no good deed', you got pretty angry when they hurt him. So, would you do anything for him? (sorry but Huge Fiyeraba fan!).**"

"Of course, I would do anything for him," Elphaba said. "I would do everything for him. I would do anything for Glinda and I tried my hardest for Nessa but nothing was ever good enough. With Fiyero, I would walk through Hell and back just so I could see his face one more time before I sacrificed myself, so he could live."

"I love you, Fae," Fiyero whispered and pulled her into a loving embrace. Glinda was openly sobbing and Nessa was sniffling. Boq was wiping his metal face with an oily rag. Dorothy looked confused. The Wizard was…drinking out his little green bottle.

"Diggs!" Taryn shouted. "You just ruined the most romantic moment ever. Did you learn nothing? Give me the bottle."

"No," he said stubbornly. "It's not like I'm addicted. I can quit any time I want to but I don't want to."

"Give me the bottle," Taryn whispered dangerously, "or I'll throw you into the hole with Morrible and a few angry Elphaba fans."

"You wouldn't dare."

"Try me." In the end, Elphaba, Fiyero, and Boq wrestled it away from him and Taryn made it vanish.

"Okay, next question," Taryn said. "**Glinda: Why don't you stand up for Elphie after she runs off after talking to the Wizard? Oh, and you are awesome too!**"

"Thank you!" Glinda said. "I think I'm pretty awesome too. I don't know why I didn't stand up for Elphie. I guess I was just scared of losing everything: the Wizard's approval, my family, Fiyero. If I had the chance to go back and do it again, I'd go with Elphie and bring along Fiyero. Then I'd break up with him, of course. No one breaks up with Galinda Upland."

"Technically, you were Glinda the Good when he broke up with you," Taryn pointed.

"Nuance," Glinda shrugged. Everyone stared at her wide-eyed.

"Since when do you know word like 'nuance'?" Elphaba asked.

"There's a big library at the Wizard's palace," Glinda explained. "I really do like reading now."

"Miracles _do _happen," Fiyero teased. Glinda rolled her eyes in a very Elphaba-like way.

"Shut up."

"Fiyero," Taryn cut in. "She has a few comments for you.** Fiyero: First, I don't like school either, and second, will you marry me? (sorry Elphie, couldn't resist!).**"

"He's mine," Elphaba shouted. "Fan girls follow us everywhere and they never seem to realize that he's **_mine_****. **Forever and always. Not yours."

"Dreams, Elphaba," Taryn soothed. "That's all us fan girls have. Dreams. Our next reviewer is Eriphabottackson. Wow, your name is super long and really cool. I like it and I don't think I mentioned that last chapter. Um, bringing Frex probably isn't a great idea. I don't need to murder anyone today. Let's just say that if he was here, he'd avoid your question by saying that he never had a daughter named Elphaba because he's a moron. I really like your next question. It made me laugh really hard. Thank your friend for me. **Nessa: Why were you such an idiot that you decided to stand under a house falling from the sky?**" Taryn chuckled after reading it and Nessa just glared at her,

"No comment," she growled which just made Taryn laugh harder.

"The...next question…is for Morrible," she gasped, "so we'll have to get her out of the hole." There was a lot of groaning and whining but Taryn snapped her fingers and an angry-looking Morrible popped out of the ground.

"So someone finally deigned to ask me a question?" she snarled.

"Yep," Taryn smiled. "**Morrible: Why do you wear so much darn makeup?!**"

"It makes me more beautiful," she retorted. Elphaba mumbled something that sounded like, "yeah and so does a paper bag." Taryn coughed into her hand to hide her laugh.

"Thank you for reviewing, Eriphabottackson," she said, "and don't worry. I kind of forgot about the white room, too."

"Can we paint it pink?" Glinda asked excitedly.

"No," Elphaba and Taryn said together. Taryn smiled and threw Glinda a neon pink flashcard.

"Thank you!" she squealed.

"No problem," Taryn laughed. "Our last reviewer is Maddy-Fae. Let me just say that I love your stories. They rock! Thank you for your compliments. I'd like to think I'm pretty funny. Anyway, on to your questions. **Elphaba: what kind of wedding did you and Fiyero have? And what would have been your dream wedding? *swooning over Fiyeraba*. **Join the club, Maddy. Wait. Is there a club because there should be."

"It was really small and simple," Elphaba said, interrupting Taryn's fan girl rant. "I had a bouquet of poppies and forget-me-nots. It seemed appropriate at the time. The only thing I would have changed is my guest list. Glinda, Nessa, and even Boq should have been on there."

"What did you dress look like?" Glinda questioned.

"It was white with black lace at the collar, sleeves, and hem." Glinda squealed so loud, everyone covered their ears.

"Thank you, Glinda," Elphaba mumbled.

"What!?" Fiyero asked, going momentarily deaf.

"I said thank you, Glinda!" Elphaba shouted back.

"What!?" Fiyero yelled.

"I SAID THANK YOU, GLINDA!" Elphaba screamed.

"There's no need to shout," Fiyero pouted.

"You did not just say that," Elphaba rolled her eyes.

"What?"

"Before Elphaba screams again, let's go to the next question," Taryn cut in when Elphaba opened her mouth. "**Morrible (even though she's in the hole): you were THERE when Elphaba was standing in the rain and you came to bring her the message from the Wizard. You SAW her getting wet. How could you still be so stupid as to believe the melting story? (Even though I'm glad you did :3.)**"

"I'll have you know that I am one of the most respected people in Oz," she sniffed. "I don't have to answer your questions."

"Do I need to push my big red button?" Taryn threatened. "It won't be pretty because I have a subscription to ACME."

"What's ACME?" Boq asked.

"You'll see if Horrible here doesn't answer."

"Do your worst," Morrible sneered.

"How do you like your anvil?" Taryn asked. "Swinging or falling?"

"Huh?"

"Falling it is." And a wonderfully heavy anvil fell from the sky and right onto Morrible's head.

"Is that what happens to all of us?" Glinda asked, horrified.

Taryn shook her head. "It's different for everyone. So, feel like answering now?"

"It's hard to keep track of my lies," Morrible admitted, holding her head. "I mix up truth and lies all the time. Like when I told Oscar that I liked his hat and then when he wore it the next day, I threw it into the fire because it was so ugly."

"I loved that hat!" the Wizard said.

"Um, let's finish this up," Elphaba suggested.

"Good idea," Taryn said. "It's already six pages long. One last question for everyone: **please raise your hand if you think Morrible looks like a fish.**" Everyone raised their hands except Morrible who sniffed and stuck her nose in the air.

"That's all for this edition of Oz Blog!" Taryn said. "I got a lot of reviews this time around. Keep it up! I'm going to go wash off Glinda's torture. Bye!"

"Wait!" Fiyero shouted. "I never got donuts!"

"Oh, look at the time," Taryn said. "I've got to go." She threw down her smoke screen and discreetly slipped out the back door.

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Review! Or I'll use my ACME subscription on you. ;)


	4. Chapter 4

AN: I'm back. Thanks so much for all the reviews. I admit this isn't my best work but I didn't want to make you guys wait too much longer, so here's another edition of the Oz Blog!

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"You didn't bring me donuts," an unhappy Fiyero pouted when Taryn reentered the room. Today she was dressed in her soccer shorts and softball t-shirt, just to annoy Glinda. She knew it had worked when she heard an angry huff from the closet. Yes, Taryn gave Glinda her own closet to stop her whining.

"You're right," Taryn said. "I didn't bring you donuts. Maybe next time."

"But you said that last time," Fiyero whined. "You gave Glinda a closet but you won't give me a donut? How is that fair?"

"It's not," Taryn shrugged. "Guess what guys! The days of colorful notecards are over. I have this lovely big hologram screen that shows the reviews so everyone can see them. It's it great?"

"Yeah wonderful," Elphaba rolled her eyes. "Can we get this over with? Some of us do have lives." Taryn narrowed her eyes.

"Just be glad I got so many reviews," she said. "I have a very special dare saved for you whenever there's a slow period. Trust me, you'll hate it."

"Hey, I thought I was your favorite character!" Elphaba exclaimed.

"You are. You remind me of me but I don't appreciate competition for my Sarcastic Crown," Taryn explained. "Our first reviewer was Elphaba-WWW but she didn't leave a question, so I'm just going to thank her for her wonderful comments. By the way Dorothy, watch your back." The young girl looked terrified and tears rose in her eyes.

"For Oz sakes!" Glinda shouted, coming back into the room. "Does she do anything but cry and talk to Dodo?"

"Um, Glinda," Elphaba said. "It's Toto."

"What?"

"The dog's name is Toto."

"No, I'm almost positive that it's Dodo."

"Glinda," Elphaba started but Fiyero put his hand over hers and shook his head.

"Elphie, come see my new closet!" Glinda exclaimed, seeing something shiny in her little room. "I think there are jewels in here."

"I'll come look at your closet, Miss Glinda," Boq said.

"Shut up, Tinny," Nessa grumbled.

"Hey that's my nickname for him!"

"Nobody cares!" everyone shouted at the farm brat. She whimpered and Taryn rolled her eyes.

"Moving on before a certain annoying child gets slapped," Taryn said. "The next review was from ExoticPeachBlossom (EPB for short). Read her stories by the way. I love them. She has a dare for Glinda. **I dare Glinda to kiss Fiyero, a NICE LOOOOONG ONE! Lol. **I did laugh out loud at this. Nothing like a little torture to start off a chapter. Get to it guys. How's a minute sound?"

"Awful," Elphaba growled.

"I'm not looking forward to it either," Glinda mumbled.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Fiyero demanded. "You used to like my kisses."

"Don't even bring that up," Elphaba snapped. "I don't like thinking about it."

"It feels wrong to kiss the boyfriend of the girl who's practically my sister," Glinda told him. "Like kissing my brother. Besides, I met someone."

"Who?" everyone asked, curious about Glinda love life for different reasons. Boq was hoping she was joking. Nessa was praying that she wasn't. Fiyero and Elphie were just happy for their friend. Morrible wanted to know who else she had to conspire against and Diggs was just bored. He must have forgotten that boredom equals piano. So tempting but…

"No time for gossip now," Taryn cut in when Glinda opened her mouth to speak. "If the readers want to know, they'll ask."

"Hint, hint," Nessa said with a rare touch of sarcasm. Elphaba looked so proud of her. "Could you guys just get it over with already? We're growing old here." Fiyero and Glinda regarded each other warily but the slowly leaned it. When their lips met, Taryn started the timer. One awkward, uneasy, and embarrassing minute later, they quickly drew apart. Glinda not-so-discreetly wiped her mouth and Fiyero wasn't much better. Taryn pushed a button on her awesome remote and some mouth wash appeared suddenly. Both of our scarred-for-life characters quickly made use of it.

"Thank you, EPB," Taryn said happily. "Thanks again for the hugs and let me know how you feel about my Fiyero-hunters."

"Wait, what?" Fiyero asked, wide-eyed.

"It's an inside joke," Taryn told him. "Our next reviewer is MyVisionIsDying. **I've got a question! *raises hand like an eager school kid* And it goes to...Elphaba & Fiyero (both of them 'cause why not!): Either one of you can answer or, or both! Now seeing as you two are married, just out of curiosity, who proposed? Oh and by the way I so want to hug you both 'cause you guys are the best! (yes, favoritism! ).**" Taryn chuckled quietly at the review. Reviews like this made being a fanfiction nerd worth it. **(AN: And I say nerd in the most loving way possible)**

"Well, it wasn't much of a proposal," Elphaba said dryly. "We ran all night to the Vinkus border and then when I was so exhausted I couldn't formulate a coherent answer, he popped the question."

"You would have said yes anyway," Fiyero teased.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night," Elphaba snorted but nudged his shoulder lovingly.

"Aw, Fiyeraba fluff," Taryn sighed. "So nice. Thanks MyVisionIsDying. Why do you guys have really long names? I hereby dub you Vision. Anyway, isn't favoritism awesome!? My teachers use it all the time and that's why I got a B- in history."

"You got a B-?" Elphaba snorted. "I've never even gotten lower than an A+ even though I was green."

"I just don't care enough to have a 4.0," Taryn shrugged " and my teachers don't like my sarcastic, cynical personality. Maddy-Fae is next on the Oz Blog! I love the Frex-hunters. I don't know if you're reading EPB's _Bro'mance_ but if not you should be. Look up my review and then you'll get the Fiyero-hunters thing. Maddy asks Morrible: **could you please die in a very painful and creepy way right now? Thank you**. Unfortunately, I can't allow that because we need her—for now, anyway— but picture a shark tank, a cliff, and a slightly too-long bungee cord."

"Of course you can't kill me," Morrible sniffed. "I'm much too important for that." Taryn glared at her.

"Don't make me rethink my decision," she threatened. "One word from me and you could be back in SouthStairs." Morrible blanched and Taryn grinned smugly. "Maddy's next question is for Boq: **what would you give to be human again?** Maddy, if not human, what? I'm thinking a single-cell organism. Any other ideas? Anyone can answer that by the way."

"Anything," Boq said. "I'd kiss Nessa. I'd give up Glinda…for a little while at least. Heck, I'd jump naked into a pool of snapping turtles, if I could only be made out of flesh and bone again."

"Hey, keep it PG," Taryn warned. "Thank you Maddy-Fae for your wonderful review. Our next reviewer is Eriphabottackson. Also no question but I like recognizing reviewers. I'll make sure to look up your stuff. And Frex has the next turn in the shark tank. Your friend sounds interesting and shockingly similar to me. I've been known to get people into trouble by saying something funny during, tests and such."

"How come that doesn't surprise me?" Elphaba rolled her eyes.

"If you're not careful, your face will get stuck that way," Taryn told her. "Thanks again Eriphabottackson! Yay! Zelda rules is back! And she likes her nickname. Good because I was going to call you that anyway. Onto her questions. **Elphaba: What does flying feel like on a broom?**"

"It's exciting," she answered. "It's like being free even when you know you aren't. Since I'm not afraid of heights, it's one of the only places I feel safe."

"ZR asks Glinda almost the same thing," Taryn said. "**Glinda: What does flying feel like in a bubble?**"

"At first, it was terrifying," she said. "I could see everything beneath me and around me perfectly and I almost couldn't tell I was actually inside of something. It only popped once and I was, luckily, close to the ground. I couldn't ride in it for a week."

"I've always wanted to travel by bubble," Taryn sighed. "Broomsticks just sound uncomfortable and less than ideal of a person who's afraid of heights."

"That's an understatement," Elphaba said.

"And now I know why people call me annoying," Taryn replied. "Good thing neither of us care. One last question from ZR.** Fiyero: How did it feel to be a scarecrow?**"

"Well, I didn't have any bones or organs, so light," Fiyero said. "When Dorothy first found me, I really couldn't remember anything but as time went on, I started to remember. There was always this feeling that the rumors about the 'Wicked Witch' were untrue. I couldn't put my finger on it until I saw the monkeys. Then I recalled Elphaba and her cause. That's when I sent the note."

"Thanks ZR!" Taryn said happily. "Okay, one more to go guys. Welcome back BlueD! I'm so glad that I almost made you waste good cereal. Dorothy, you know have three people who want to push you off a cliff."

"I'm positive there's more than that," Elphaba said. "I mean there's a whole fandom of Dorothy haters."

"I'm sure at least some of them don't mind her," Taryn said. "Anyway, thanks again BlueD. I really like your dare but we'll get to that later. Question time! **Morrible: Were you a troubled/heartless child?**"

"I most certainly was not!" Morrible cried indignantly. "I was adored by everyone."

"Yeah right," Glinda scoffed. "I bet you were the kid who set their dolls on fire."

"I didn't play with dolls. My family gave me a knife set for my fourth birthday." Horrified silence met her confession.

"And there's your answer," Taryn said. "Troubled might be an understatement. BlueD's next question is for Elphaba: **I'm sure you've heard of the Frex Hunters, (credit to Maddy-Fae, who is pretty amazing at writing if you ask me) because it's kinda famous, and I was a part of it, I had Frex's head for dinner :3 Anyways...my question is...how did you like it?** That's really gross, but I appreciate you getting rid of that moron."

"Oh I enjoyed it immensely," Elphaba said, grinning evilly. "I always felt like Frex died much too soon. I was going to let him die in disgrace later in life. I like the Frex-hunters so much more."

"Go Frex-hunters!" Taryn shouted. "Here's a question for Fiyero**: I heard you like donuts. What is your favorite :)**?"

"The edible kind," Fiyero answered immediately, earning him an eye roll from his wife.

"I'm proud of you, Yero," she said sarcastically. "You used a three syllable word correctly in a sentence."

"I'm not completely brainless," Fiyero pouted.

"No, not completely," Elphaba laughed.

"You guys are adorable," Taryn sighed. "I wish I had what you two have."

"Yeah, me too," Boq and Nessa mumbled at the same time.

"Should have thought of that before leaving," Nessa told him.

"You were crazy and holding me hostage!"

"You could have just told me that you loved Glinda in the beginning!"

"When I tried to tell you, you ripped out my heart and had Elphaba turn me into a walking tin can."

"Will you two just kiss and get this over with?" Elphaba sighed angrily. Boq and Nessa's eyes widened.

"No," Taryn said. "No. I'm not a Bessa shipper."

"Then you approve of Gloq?" Boq asked hopefully.

Taryn shook her head. "Nope, but only because I don't think people should be rewarded for stalking. And the fact that you're an idiot."

"If you don't do Gloq and you don't do Bessa," Elphaba said, "does Boq end up alone?"

"Boq can do what he wants," Taryn replied, "but if I write any other stories I might pair Boq with ShenShen just to punish him."

"Please no," Boq groaned.

"BlueD has one more thing," Taryn said. "She wants Fiyero to take his shirt off."

"No," Elphaba said flatly. "I'm the only one who gets to see him with his shirt off."

"Can we at least see his abs?" Taryn asked. "Please."

"Fine," Elphaba grumbled and Fiyero happily pulled up his shirt to show off his perfect six-pack. *BANG* *BANG* *BANG*

"What was that?" Oscar asked.

"That is the swarm of fan girls," Taryn said. "Did you know they can sense a shirtless Fiyero from a mile away? Then they text all their fan girl friends to join them. Thank you BlueD for your review. I'm going to get out of here before the fan girls break in here. Oh Fiyero, here you go." A box of donuts fell into his lap while a first aid kit fell into Elphaba's.

"Yay!" Fiyero squealed like a little girl.

"What's this for?" Elphaba asked.

"Um…no reason," Taryn said and disappeared through a trap door just as the fan girls burst into the room.

"What're you doing?"

"No! Get back!"

"Help! They're everywhere!"

"No! You can't have a piece of my hair!"

"Omigosh! He has the diamonds!"

"Take a picture quick!" The ruckus continued above her as Taryn chuckled. A message appeared on the hologram upstairs as she typed.

_That's what the first-aid kit was for. Thank you, fan girls. You may go. Please, take a souvenir Fiyero doll on your way out._

More screams were heard and a stampede of girls headed out of the white room. The characters groaned. Well, except Dorothy. She was ignored.

"How come she didn't get attacked?" Nessa asked.

"Because no one likes her," Elphaba groaned. "When Taryn comes back…" Another message appeared on the big screen.

_ Thank you for tuning into Oz Blog! Oh and Elphaba. If you do anything, I'll send in more fan girls. Have fun!_

Then she was gone. With more grumbling, the characters began to fix each other up, promising to kill Taryn the next time they saw her.

* * *

Please review! I enjoy hearing from you so much. Even if you're writing to tell me that you hate it. Just let me know.


	5. Chapter 5

AN: *Peeks out from behind couch* Please don't throw things at me. I'm so sorry. Things have been really hectic lately and I'm writing a book that's distasting me. Speaking of which, I need people to tell me what they think of that as well. I posted the prologue on fictionpress, which is this site's counterpart. If anyone is interested, let me know. Enjoy the Oz Blog!

* * *

"Oh my Oz," Taryn said, coming into the room. Today she was wearing jean shorts she had cut herself and a black blouse. Her hair was up in its usual ponytail. "I leave you alone for ten minutes and you all try to kill each other." The white room was in complete chaos. Glinda's pretty, pink closet was on fire. Morrible was a currently falling to the bottom of a bottomless pit. The Wizard was sitting in the corner, rocking back and forth. Elphaba was writing spells on the white wall and Glinda was attempting to convince her it would look better in pink. Fiyero was fidgety and looking around for something to eat. Boq was banging his head against the wall with a metallic *CLANG*. Nessa was crawling all over the floor, looking for the trap door. Dorothy just sat in the corner, crying. Finally! Something normal. When Taryn spoke, everyone—except Morrible, who was still falling—glared at her.

"You've been gone a month!" they shouted.

"It hasn't been that long has it?" Taryn muttered and glanced at her calendar. "Dear Oz. It has been. I'm sorry guys. I lost track of time and then I had a family reunion where all of my family members wanted my pen name so they could read my stuff. Needless to say, I was exhausted after trying to escape them."

"She said the E word!" the Wizard hissed. Everyone stared at him but he just continued to rock back and forth.

"Um…I think Diggs went insane," Taryn said. She pressed a button on her remote and a door opened.

"Door!" Fiyero shouted. They all rushed to it but after Dr. Dillamond came in, it disappeared without a trace.

"Hello children," he greeted everyone.

"Doctor!" Elphaba exclaimed. "It's so wonderful to see you."

"I'm just here to fix Diggs, I'm afraid," Dillamond sighed. "Taryn's not sure how I would answer questions, so I'm here just so I can be in the story."

"Thanks for explaining, Doc," Taryn smiled. "I couldn't have said it better myself."

"Ha ha," Boq laughed sarcastically. "Very funny. Can we get on with it?"

"Fine," Taryn said with a glare. "Doc, could you lead Mr. Diggs to the safe room? I'll call him back in when I need him."

"Of course," Dillamond said and gently lead a giggling Wizard away.

"Yay! Question time!" Taryn squealed. "I bet you guys missed me."

"Not particularly," Elphaba said and Taryn deflated.

"There's this thing called lying," Taryn told her with a pout. "You should try it sometime. Our first reviewer was Eriphabottackson. Hey! I looked up your name. So cool! I like all those things too. I'm a Potter nerd. I read the seventh book in a day and a half when I was ten. Loved it! She doesn't really have a question and I don't really want to say her comment. Elphie hurt my feelings."

"Spit it out," Glinda said throwing her hand up.

"No need to get snippety," Taryn said. "Eriphabottackson says, **Just tell her that she is the most determined, spirited, kind woman I have ever seen a play about in my life, and that she's my ultimate idol. And I also apologize for dressing up like Dorthy for Halloween when I was five. And I'm sorry that both of your fathers were jerks to you (no offense to Diggs; he didn't know...) And you are like the big sister I always wanted(no offense to Nessa, but let's all admit she can be annoying.)**"

"I'm touched," Elphaba smiled.

"I apologize that you went as Dorothy too," Taryn said, "although it does seem fitting that you went as a murderer for Halloween."

"I'm not a murderer!" Dorothy exclaimed.

"Everyone that Dorothy murdered, please stand," Taryn said. Elphaba and Nessa rose from their seats.

"Everyone that wanted to kill themselves because of Dorothy, please stand." Everyone stood up. Even Toto got up off of his little cushion.

"There you have it folks," Taryn said. "Dorothy is an almost mass murderer. Next reviewer! Thanks again Eriphabottackson! BlueD is back on the Oz Blog! And yes, you can have one of the Fiyero dolls. Maybe even two because I made you wait this long. I also have Dorothy voodoo dolls if anyone is interested. They inflict real pain! BlueD's first question is for Fiyero: **One: I like those donuts too :3 Now for the question, who do YOU hate more, Horrible (oops. I mean Morrible) or Dorky (oops, I mean Dorothy. Stupid auto-correct :P)**" Taryn chuckled. Auto-correct? Yeah, right.

"That's a hard choice," Fiyero mused. "I hate Dorothy because she's really, really, really, really, REALLY annoying but Morrible caused all of this. Plus she's a teacher." He shudders. "Yep. Definitely Morrible."

"Thanks Fiyero," Taryn said and discreetly glanced at her phone. It's new wallpaper was a shirt-less Fiyero. Shh! Elphaba must never know! "BlueD's next question is for Glinda: **WHO? WHO IS THIS SPECIAL SOMEONE? How'd you meet? Where'd you meet? *sits down "criss-cross-applesauce* TELL. ME. EVERYTHING.**"

"Um," Glinda chuckled nervously, as Boq leaned forward expectantly. "He's a guard in the palace. He found me crying in the garden on the anniversary of Elphie's death. And the rest is history. I'm hoping he'll propose soon."

"AW!" Taryn sighed. "What's his name?"

"Andre," she blushed.

"I remember him!" Fiyero said. "He's a good guy."

"I know," Glinda said dreamily.

"I want to meet him," Elphaba announced. "I need to make sure he's perfect for my Glinny."

"How 'bout it, folks?" Taryn asked. "Should we introduce Andre? Ps. What should he look like if I do? Suggestions? Okay, one more question from BlueD and then a dare. Elphaba: **What's one thing you regret doing?**"

Elphaba sighed. "I regret not coming back for Glinda and Fiyero. If we would have joined together, I wouldn't have had to fake my death and we could all be together." Taryn nodded and pressed a button on her remote. Morrible stopped falling and appeared suddenly by her chair.

"We have a dare for you, Morrible," Taryn glared. "**Be nice to everyone in the room. Or else we'll take away your knife collection. MWAHAHA!** Very nice cackle, BlueD. One day, we'll get as good as Elphaba."

"Keep dreaming," Elphaba mumbled.

"Not my knife collection!" Morrible shouted. "I can't be _nice_." She said as a curse.

"Give me your knives then," Taryn shrugged.

"NOOOOOOOO!" Morrible screamed.

"Then be nice," Taryn ordered. "Say thank you to the nice reviewer for me."

"Thank you," Morrible said through gritted teeth.

"Congratulations," Taryn said. "You are the first ever person to be thanked but Morrible the Horrible. Tell your friends, family, and the world of this momentous occasion. Thanks BlueD for your review and your continued support. Next up is Ultimate Queen of Cliffies, formerly known as Maddy-Fae. I'm just going to keep on calling you Maddy, okay? Um, can I join your mob? I went a week without internet and I get the email that EPB updated Bro'mance. It's an Author's Note saying that she's not writing anymore for a while. After that last chapter?! I was not happy. Exotic Peach Blossom if you're reading this, I still love you but you're killing me, _chica_. Oh and I promise I'm still reading it. I just had to read it on limited time on my grandparents' computer, so I couldn't review. Anyway, Maddy has a dare for Boq. **jump naked into a pool of snapping turtles. If he does that, I'm okay with you changing him back, Taryn.**"

"Really?" Boq asked excitedly. Taryn nodded and pressed the big red button on her remote. Munchkin Boq was back, wearing only a speedo.

"Um, I'm keeping our audience's innocence intact," Taryn said. "And protecting Boq from permanent damage. Don't worry. He's still jumping into the pool of snapping turtles. And then, I'm making Morrible take care of him afterwards. Just because I'm mean." She pressed another button and Boq fell into a pool of snapping turtles.

"Nice turtles. Good turtles. Ow! No. Not there! Ahh! Let me out! Dear Oz, let me out!" Elphaba, Nessa, and Glinda giggled while Fiyero winced.

"Poor guy," he muttered. Taryn let a bruised and slightly bloody Boq come out and made Morrible clean him up and get him some clothes."

"Now that we've had some comic relief," Taryn smiled, "Maddy has a question for Fiyero: **Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven?** We'll get to your other dare next, but the Wizard is still crazy at the moment."

"Of course it didn't hurt," Fiyero answered with a dashing grin. "Every girl within a five miles radius could feel the world get brighter and came to investigate. They cushioned my fall." Elphaba punched his arm and he winced. Taryn laughed to herself and signaled Dillamond to bring out the Wizard.

"Is he better?" she asked.

"I'm fine," Diggs grumbled. "What do you want?"

"I have the most wonderful dare for you," Taryn smirked. "**Oh, and a dare for the Wizard and Morrible: kiss each other. Just because I hate you both and you're both disgustifying and I want to see you suffer.** I want to see them suffer too." Morrible and the Wizard glanced at each other and shuddered.

"Get to it," Glinda smiled. No one knew she could look that…evil. Morrible and Diggs slowly moved together and everyone looked away when their lips met. Old people kissing. Gross! After a suitable amount of time, Taryn turned around and allowed them to separate. She also did not provide them with any mouth wash because that would defeat the purpose of suffering.

"Thanks so much Maddy!" Taryn said. "Elphaba'sGirl is back again! Yay! I would cover up the Morrible hole except then we would have dares like the last one. Who doesn't like to see her suffer? And every day is a wicked day. That's what makes the world so awesome. She has a comment for Elphaba that she forgot the mention in her questions. **I would just like to inform Elphaba that anyone who calls you wicked will be dead before they get out of that room. Hear me? DEAD. That includes EVERYONE. I will KILL THEM. And then we can rejoice and dance on their grave (yay Frex Hunters) and Elphaba will be recognized the the wonderful, awesome, beautiful, sweet, kind, SPLENDID person she is**. **I have spoken. **I'll help you kill them. No one calls Elphie wicked. Actually, I do but only to call her wickedly awesome. Onto the questions. Elphaba and Nessa; **what's your sisterly relationship like?**"

"It's great!" Nessa said.

"Do you want a truth or a lie?" Elphaba said at the same time.

"Both!" Glinda said.

"It's absolutely wonderful," Elphaba said, dryly. "We were the perfect family. It's fine, I suppose. I was more of a servant to Nessa than a sister but I love her regardless. Besides, it was mostly Frex's fault anyway."

"Which one is the lie?" Dorothy asked.

"Sweet Oz!" Boq exclaimed with a wince. "Is she really that dense?"

"Apparently," Taryn replied. "The next question is for Fiyero; **when did you realize you loved Elphaba? The day with the Lion Cub? If so... Why didn't you tell her? I mean, she's awesome**. I was thinking the same thing."

"I realized I love Elphaba a few days after the Lion Cub," Fiyero said. "I was kissing Glinda and all I could think about was Elphaba and how much I wanted to kiss her. I couldn't tell her because…well she's intimidating. Plus, I couldn't bring myself to hurt Glinda like that."

"So you left her after leading her on?" Taryn scoffed. "Sorry, that's the only problem I have with Fiyero in the play. Call me crazy. One more question for Elphaba; **what goes through your mind when you're singing?**"

"For me it's like flying," Elphaba smiled dreamily. "It's freedom. I can sing whatever I want to and people can't do a thing about it. I used to sing a lullaby my mother would sing to us to help us sleep whenever I was alone in the woods or when some of the rebels' children couldn't sleep. It always made me feel better."

"Thank you Elphaba'sGirl," Taryn said. "You're awesome! ZR, welcome back! I was really tempted to ignore this but I appreciate your support too much. Tell you what. I'll kiss both of them on the cheek and everyone but Elphaba will be happy. I'm not going to give my first kiss to a fictional character. Sorry."

"Wait, what?" Elphaba said. Taryn ignored her and walked over to Boq. She kissed his cheek and then made her way over to Fiyero. With a wink at Elphaba, she kissed his cheek as well.

"Ta da!" Taryn said. "Thanks ZR! She also has a question for Elphaba. **Ok, Elphie: What kind of spells have you cast in your life?**"

"I don't know," Elphaba said with a glare at Taryn. "A few from the Grimmerie and a few that I didn't even know existed until I got angry. When I was trying to change Fiyero back, I accidently turned him into a fish. It was temporary but it was terrifying."

"Think about how I felt," Fiyero grumbled.

"Thanks ZR," Taryn laughed. "We have a new reviewer. Everyone welcome JCBolt. Um, you asked a lot of questions and I loved all of them but I'm already on page five in a word document. If you ask them again, I'll totally answer but right now I'll only answer the ones that made me laugh the hardest and I'm curious about. For Fiyero, **I'm sorry about the fangirls. Can I ask, when did you get the diamonds?**"

"It's a tradition in Vinkus that when a boy becomes a man, he gets tattooed," Fiyero answered. "The diamonds are given for strength and honor. I got them when I was fourteen."

"Cool," Taryn said. "Next question is for Morrible, **the real Wicked Witch. First off, I'd like to inform you that in my story, you die. Dead. In prison. I enjoyed it. Do you hate yourself? HOW DO YOU SLEEP AT NIGHT, YOU COLD, HEARTLESS- okay. I'm okay.**"

"Of course I don't hate myself," Morrible sniffed."I'm wonderful. I sleep just fine, thank you."

"This is a classic example of evil," Taryn said in her tour-guide voice. "See how she shows no remorse or feelings. The arrogance only makes it worse, not to mention her fishy appearance."

"I don't look like a fish!" Morrible shouted.

Taryn ignored her. "JC also tells Dorothy to stop trying because we all hate her. That is probably the best advice I've heard in my life. Nessa, **why do you care so much for your father? I mean, no one else does. PEER PRESSURE, DANGIT.**"

"He loved me," Nessa said. "No one else loved me because I was in this chair."

"Sweet Oz!" Elphaba murmured under her breath.

"There's the threequestion limit," Taryn sighed. "Sorry, but I did limit it. Let me just say that you ask excellent questions and that Toto most certainly hate Dorothy as much as the rest of us but he's a dog not a Dog. Thanks again, JC! One more review guys. MyVisionIsDying54321 is back. She has a dare for Dorothy. Um, it's physically impossible for her to do that but we can try. **Dorothy, could you please try and stop being such an emotional little brat, yes I know that might hurt your feeling but please, stop. If you can't then someone, anyone, has my permission to slap her all the way to Kansas and back.**"

"I call it!" Nessa shouted. "We all know she can't do it, so I call slapping her to Kansas and back."

"Fine," Taryn sighed.

"I'm not a brat," Dorothy said, huge tears filling her eyes. "I ju—ju—just wanted to go home! I didn't mean to kill the witches."

"Go for it, Ness," Elphaba growled. Nessa stalked up to Dorothy and slapped her as hard as she could. Dorothy sailed through the air and Toto barked happily.

"She'll be back by the next update," Taryn said. "I hope you forgive me for making you wait so long and review. Love you guys! See you soon!" She disappeared and left the grumbling characters to sit and wait.

* * *

Review. Please! I'll love you forever if you do. And seriously let me know if you want to read my original story. My friend who reads my stuff doesn't like this kind of story. Thanks again!


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